Thick Hair, a Curly Girl’s Woe…?

“Do you hear me America? Don’t call me if you got a whole bunch of natural hair, ’cause I ain’t in-terested!”

That’s from my favorite character Sean on VH1’s Beverly Hills Fabulous as he was straightening the hair of a fellow curly girl. If I had hair like her’s… I would not be messing with my twist outs LOL. I know he was just kidding around (I hope), but that brought be back – wayyyyyyyyyy back to when I was relaxing my hair. Back in the day, I would go months without a relaxer, mainly because it would take 45 minutes for my hair to take a relaxer and the whole process would just leave me drained.


But I digress, I loved twists and weaves and all those lovely time-consuming styles that would give me a nice 2/3 month break from combing my hair. If you haven’t read or heard this before, I am LAZY!. My problem was my thick hair. From relaxers to extensions, I always had to hide my hair under a scarf and get the style quote FIRST before I let my hair out. Crazy right? Sadly this is all true. Ladies who would come before and after me would for some reason pay less than me for the same service. I was about 19, when I realized that it was my thick hair that was messing up my pockets. Now don’t get me wrong, I love my thick hair. I know it’s a blessing and I would not change my hair circumstances for anything in the world, but having to hide my hair to save my wallet? That’s just not fair.

Even after I stopped relaxing and was heavy into kinky twists, I would flat iron my hair or blow dry it as straight as possible so that stylists wouldn’t charge me a crazy price. Not only did they unintentionally make me me feel bad about my hair, but I was damaging it in the process!!! It took me a long time for me to own how I felt about myself and my hair. Peer pressure is a mother… but that doesn’t mean you should buckle under this “perceived” pressure. I say “perceived” because they didn’t tell me to relax my hair or damage my hair straightening it. It was their reactions that always made me feel bad, but SO WHAT? I had to grow as a person and re-examine my ideas of beauty to get over it.

For my thick-haired girls, curly girls and naturos our there, don’t keep beating yourself up because you don’t have the straightest hair or the perfect curl. If you feel good about yourself and you’re not hurting anybody, keep loving yourself and being beautiful in your own unique way.

So yes, Sean brought me back to my hair-hiding days, but he also reminded me of my thick-haired journey and the growth that came with it. Don’t let your own insecurities stop you from loving yourself. Sean may not be interested, but there are a lot of people who love our big beautiful curls! “Big hair don’t care!”

Keep Growing! :)

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